No matter what I did, he always understood me. He would be my support for anything. As I go down this journey in my life, I miss him most. I can't imagine what he would have said or did.....but I just know I miss him.
Today my mom called and I could tell she had been crying. I asked what was going on and she said she came across Dad's journal....the one he kept from the time he was diagnosed until the time he had his brain surgery and couldn't write anymore. There were not too many entries, but my name was mentioned most. I asked her if I could read it. She said certainly and then told me Dad would want me to have it. Needless to say, I hauled butt to my moms house to retrieve it.
When I got in my car, "I'll be missing you" by Puff Daddy was playing. What a PERFECT song to hear. I cried all the way to mom's listening to it. http://youtube/qWuBS1HmI3M
I got to Mom's and we hugged for a long period. Then she gave me the journal. I sat down and read it, crying the entire time. He often referred to me as "Rachel, the ever so faithful Rachel". I tried to be. I wanted to be. I wanted to be by his side every second as he battled that demon of glioblastoma. I am glad he felt I was. It makes my heart smile. I know he would be right beside me as I battle this demon. I know he is on my shoulder lifting me up as I slowly recover from what the devil tried to take of me. I know I will be back to myself again and healthy. For my dad and everyone else.
I love you Dad, this recovery is for my family, my friends, and YOU!
No comments:
Post a Comment