Bitter Sweet

As my brother gears up to celebrate his 30th birthday, We are also remembering the loss of his twin...my sweet brother Jeremiah "joey" who lost his life 15 years ago tomorrow...
15 years ago.  It doesn't seem like 15 years.  Doesn't even seem like 5.  I often wonder (a lot) what he would look like, what he would be doing, would he be married, kids, a doctor, maybe an EMT, ect....
I miss him so much.  My daughter was barely 2 weeks old when he passed away. It was a tragic accident with a gun...
I remember the night it happened....it was a quiet night and my husband and I were house sitting at my grandmothers.  My mom called us and said HURRY, JOEY IS HURT...by the time we got there life-light was landing and I was just in shock.  Everyone was trying to keep me from going into the bedroom from seeing the paramedics work to revive him.  At the time, we didn't know if he had actually been shot.  Only that he was unconscious and there was a gun by his side...a gun that my parents owned and had put up in the closet.  My brother had been getting Christmas lights down from the attic, must have fallen, hit the gun on the way down, and the gun went off when it hit the ground. A freak, tragic, accident.  Changed my life, our lives, forever.
We all miss him so much....tonight is the anniversary of it happening.
I miss you Joey and love you so much.
There is one thing I do know, he would not have been a RWNJ like his twin. =) lolol He woulda been on my team! Although his twin Josh is amazing, just a little too conservative for my blue blood....I love him anyway, he is awesome!